Author: hells_half_acre (ME!)
Characters: Sam and Dean (and Clay and Whathisname)
Summary: Sam and Dean go to a double-bill of Friday The 13th and My Bloody Valentine.
Written for: mymuseandi
"Dude, two movies for $7!" Dean replied, "I wish they had more of these. By the way, you're paying - punishment for seeing the Raiders movie without me."
"You were in hell!"
Sam got his revenge when the cute blond ticket-girl told them that she hoped they enjoyed their 'date night'...the look on Dean's face...
They sat towards the back, individual buckets of popcorn on their laps. As soon as he sat down, Dean slouched low in his seat, and let his head roll closer to Sam. 'Oh,' Sam thought, 'so it's going to be that type of movie-going experience.' Hiding a sigh, Sam slouched low too, his knees pressing against the chair in front of him.
The lights went down and the projector started up behind them, and Dean's low whisper started almost immediately.
"Dude, that Clay guy looks like an idiot,"
"No he doesn't, shut-up."
"Bet he dies first,"
"How many horror movies you seen? he's the protagonist, he'll live the longest."
"Whatever, where's Freddy?"
"It's Jason. Freddy's in Nightmare on Elm Street."
"Man, that guy is built."
"Something you want to tell me Sammy?"
For the second movie, which was also a remake, but neither of them had ever seen the original, they needed to put on 3D glasses.
"How do I look?"
"Like a dork."
"Yeah, well you do too."
"My ass is asleep."
"Too much information man, now watch the goddamn movie."
"The killer is totally that dude."
"How can you tell?"
"It's my job to know these things - your's too."
"Dean, if he's the killer than it's not our job at all."
"Yeah, but we gotta be able to tell the difference."
"It's a movie, Dean. Can't we just watch the movie."
"This dude's way better looking than the guy in the other movie."
"Something you want to tell me, Dean?"
"Sam? Are your eyes closed?"
"Heh...this movie too scary for you Sammy? You want me to hold your hand?"
"Shut-up. It's the...it's the 3D, I just...it's disconcerting."
"'Disconcerting' is just a fancy word for 'scary', eh college-boy?"
"I'm not scared. I just don't like things flying at my face..."
"Things fly at your face all the time"
"Yeah, but I can dodge them! I'm not confined to a chair and the things don't follow me when I move my head, and I know it's not real, but I can't exactly turn off my instincts, I don't see how people can-"
"Ok, ok...why don't you take the 3D glasses off?"
"Because then the movie would be all blurry."
"...uh, Sam? You'd still see more of the movie than with your eyes closed."
"I can still hold your hand if you want."
"I said shut-up"
"You going to eat the rest of your popcorn?"
"No, you can have it."
Title: Attack of the Coffee-Monster
Characters: Sam, Dean, OMC, OFC
Summary: Sam and Dean battle a coffee-monster
Written for: auriliawestlake who is a fan of the Encyclopedia of Weirdness, and wanted a monster made of coffee.
"Why is everyone screaming?" Sam replied. Dean opened his eyes to see people pouring out the diner...screaming. Then he and Sam were running, pushing their way against the flow to get inside and see what was happening...
"Holy..." Sam said once they were inside. There, crawling it's way over the counter, was a huge black blob of undulating liquid. The smell of coffee was so strong, Dean felt his energy spike from the fumes alone. There was a waitress and a few customers trapped at the back of the narrow diner, making small panicked whimpering noises.
"Are you ok?!" Sam yelled back, and received some frantic nods.
"It ate Francis!!" The waitress said in disbelief, "it just...it rolled right over him and he didn't come out...he'll drown!"
"Where did it come from?" Dean asked, as he watched the black blob seemingly try to decide if it was going to go after the cowering customers or come after him and Sam.
"The new coffee maker!" the waitress replied pitifully, "oh god...I've gone insane."
"Sam, try to get to the coffee maker," Dean ordered, "I'm going to distract it."
"What?!" Sam said, "how?"
"I'm going to try to find Francis," Dean replied, just as the coffee-blob lunged for them. "Go! Hurry!"
Sam leaped over the counter to make a dive for the coffee machine, while Dean made a dive directly into the mess of coffee.
The coffee-blob slowed after the impact with Dean. Sam watched out of the corner of his eyes as the surface of the coffee monster undulated violently.
Sam ripped the coffee machine from the wall, and studied it closely. Sure enough, demonic symbols were carved crudely around the base.
"What the hell?" Sam muttered. There was a crash from behind him, a human arm stuck out of the coffee-monster. It wasn't Dean's.
Sam quickly ran back over and grabbed hold of the hand, pulling as hard as he could. A man in his 20s tumbled out...covered in coffee.
"Francis!" the waitress cried, and ran over. He wasn't breathing. Sam helped haul Francis away from the monster, and left the waitress to revive him. He had to destroy the demonic coffee-maker.
Not knowing what to do, Sam smashed it on the floor first. The coffee monster remained. So he grabbed up the pieces and ran into the kitchen, lighting the nearest gas stove and shoving the coffee maker directly on the burner, while pouring salt over it. The kitchen staff was too busy cowering in the back to do anything more than gawk at him.
There was a great splashing sound from the diner and a soft thump, that had Sam running out of the kitchen.
Dean was sprawled on the floor, soaked in coffee, and coughing up more coffee.
"Dean!" Sam yelled.
"Ugh," Dean replied.
Sam knelt in the remains of the coffee-monster and patted his brother on the back. He glanced up to see that the waitress had successfully saved Francis, who was now giving Dean a tired smile of gratitude.
"That was the most delicious monster we've ever fought!" Dean said suddenly, as he stood up.
"Are you ok? Do you-" Sam started to say,
"Was it the coffee-maker? Did you destroy it? It must have been the coffee-maker? Did you just smash it or did you have to burn it? Judging by the smell, I'd say you burnt it. It was the best smelling monster we've ever fought too. God it smelled so good. It was a little hot though, on the inside I mean. I don't think I'm scalded, but it was close. I'm more concerned about that Francis guy. Is he ok? Oh hey, there he is. You ok dude? Huh, he seems tired. Did you know that there are people who have different reactions to coffee? Some people it wakes them up, but others it makes them tired. That usually happens when you drink too much coffee. DO YOU DRINK TOO MUCH COFFEE FRANCIS? Oh, I think he's napping. Anyway, he should lay off the coffee. Do you want breakfast Sammy? I don't think we should eat here, but I could use some breakfast. Maybe some pancakes. You remember those pancakes in Vermont. Those were good pancakes. Hey, you want to drive to Vermont for pancakes? We could get ice-cream too, I bet, that's where the Ben and Jerry's factory is..."