I've had only one glass of wine, but I'm actually housesitting, so I didn't have to walk home afterward. So, that's nice. Still, only took bad notes and watched once, so same old same old there.
Anyway, let's talk about the episode...
We begin in Hell, where day-actors aren't as good at acting drunk as non-day actors. OUCH. I'm starting off way too mean. The good news is that we have a nice diverse range of demons, who are standing around in suits hoping Lucifer returns at some point - or drinking, assuming all is lost and there is no longer a king of hell.
That is, until Asmodeus, the final Prince of Hell walks in. And they've very much styled him after Lucifer (original concept) because he's in a nice white suit... BUT, actually, they've styled him after one of those Southern villains... you know, the kind that inevitably have their climatic scene at a Klan rally before the heroes kill 'em. Anyway, he's a little over the top, but promises to return Hell to Fire and Brimestone and less corporate. So, Crowley era is for-sure over... so why is HQ still in River-whatever Rhode Island? Seriously, did SPN forget that that throne room is on earth? It made sense for when Crowley was King, because Crowley hates hell... well, maybe all demons hate hell, so it still makes sense. We'll get to what else doesn't make sense later.
Also, why does when he kill them they die like they've seen angels? That DOESN'T MAKE ANY SENSE. Asmodeus is not an angel. Is it supposed to be that he's smiting them? Because that doesn't make any sense either - demons can't smite people, only HOLY things can smite. Ugh!
God, I'm failing my own rules on the blog.
What's his name... Drexel? He's got really nice eyes.
But, listen, we all know that I'm a villain hater, so let's just move on to our heroes... because I really liked Sam and Dean in this episode, so I want to talk about that.
First off, they give me great Timeline information, like the fact that their 12 hours from home! THEN they have GREAT lines:
Sam: "You want me to drive?"
Dean: 'When do I ever want you to drive?"
-HA! I love it... also, it's true. I have to physically force myself to allow my little sister to drive when we go places together. I'm pretty good if it's her car, but if it's my car, I.. well, let's put it this way: We drove across the country together in 2009 (New Brunswick to Vancouver). We were supposed to share the driving. She drove for 2 hours on the first day, and I drove for the next 9 days until we reached our destination.
We also begin the long (season long?) argument about "the kid" now... with Sam and Dean stating their cases. Well, we know Dean's case - he thinks the kid is dangerous and wants to kill him. Sam's case is that they can use the kid to find mom... also, maybe he's not evil?
CUT TO MARY!
Mary is being kept alive by Lucifer because once he finds a way back to his own world, he wants to use her as a hostage in a hostage exchange - her for Jack. Mary questions what on earth he could possibly understand about parenting, and then a meteor of some sort comes out of the sky and Mary uses the opportunity to flee.
Back in Hell, the demons have not been able to find Lucifer. And Drexel makes the mistake of saying "we even checked the cage" and IMMEDIATELY INCITES MY WRATH. Listen folks, the cage is not reachable by demons - it is buried in the lowest reaches of Hell where no demon can access. You know how we know this? Azazel had to kill a bunch of nuns in a church in the vague HOPE of locating the cage and being able to talk with Lucifer - if he knew where the cage was in Hell and could "check it" then I'm pretty sure that wouldn't have been needed. FURTHERMORE, even two bloody seasons ago when they freed Lucifer (which I'm also still angry about), they had to do it by first transporting him via magic to a secondary cage, because - and this is the important bit here - they cannot just WALK UP TO THE ACTUAL CAGE. So, unless Drexel meant that they possessed a witch and made her attempt to summon Lucifer from the cage - or, they killed a bunch of nuns, contacted Michael through a thin veil between planes of existence and said "hey, your bro didn't happen to return there, did he?" then I AM ANGRY.
But, I'll put it aside, because whatever! Fine. We'll put this in the box with "Reapers are angels" and pretend it never happened.
Asmodeus then gives us a bit of backstory - explaining that the scars on his face were made by Lucifer, when Asmodeus tried to free the "Shadeem" and I'm putting that in quotes because I have absolutely no idea how to spell what he's saying, or even if I heard that right. Okay, so nitpick the third: Lucifer had to have been free in order to do that, so we're talking pre-Cain and Abel here. Has Asmodeus had that vessel since the Garden? Or is his demon self so scared that it bleeds over onto vessels? Seriously... THINK ABOUT THE MECHANICS OF YOUR WORLD, WRITERS!
Anyway, the shadeem are apparently really bad demony creatures that even Lucifer is afraid of, and who have been locked away in some sort of cage in Hell by God, as another Levithan like "ooops, these things are evil"
BACK TO SAM AND DEAN, whom I love....
They've stopped at a motel, because Dean was so tired he was hallucinating sheep on the road. Which is pretty hilarious - and also something that legit happens when you are too sleepy to drive. My BFF once hallucinated a streetsign turning into a person and running out in front of his truck. That scared him right back into wakefulness!
Jack finds Scooby-Doo on the TV, which is SPOILERS, foreshadowy fun.
Dean comes over and puts the kibosh on fun. NO FUN ALLOWED FOR EVIL BOYS!
He then orders Jack to sleep on the couch. Sam is like I can sleep on the couch? And Jack is like "it's okay, I don't mind." And I'm like "thanks, Jack, because 6'5'' guy on the couch doesn't make any sense whatsoever. I mean, I know Sam's a damn martyr, but LINES MUST BE DRAWN."
But before sleeps, they have food and beer. Dean questions the beer, asking Jack how old he is "3 days 17 hours and 42 minutes" - I mean, not for nothing, but can they ask Jack how old he is in every single episode? It really helps with timelining!
Jack is also being adorable and mimicking everything Dean does. Which, yeah, adorable and heartbreaking, because he's probably doing it to get approval... and it's not going to work.
Jack tries to ask about his family - Lucifer, God, whether family is good or bad. Dean says family is good "sometimes" - and then Sam changes the topic to try to ask about Jack's powers. Can he travel anytime he wants? Jack doesn't understand. Dean uses the word "teleport" - Jack still doesn't understand. Dean asks him, if he wanted to be on the other side of the door, how would he do it? And Jack gets up and opens the door, walks out and closes it behind him. Sam takes this as proof that Jack is "more human than we think."
Once they let Jack back in, Dean asks him if his father - Lucifer - ever talked to him while he was in the womb. Jack has memories of such connections, but doesn't share them, and in fact looks really disturbed upon remembering them.
Then we see a mysterious figure walking down the hallway. Dean and Sam pull the ol' attack the newcomer, and then discover that it's Donatello, the prophet! Who asks if God is with them, before we cut to commercial.
When we come back from commercials, we discover that Donatello is indeed soulless (which I was worried they were going to forget about.) But every time he comes to a moral crossroads, he just asks himself "what would Mr. Rogers do" and so far it's worked out. That's pretty hilarious and a really good motto. I love it.
We also discover that their in Wyoming. Thanks, Donatello!
Donatello explains that he felt when Jack was born - an immense power in the world to rival God's... and he followed it. Dean (I think, may have been Sam) tells Donatello about Jack being Lucifer's kid. Donatello says that Jack's power is not dark or toxic like Lucifer's was. And throughout this whole conversation, Sam and Dean are continuing their argument, using their faces to point out when something Donatello says supports their side or not (or actually using their words in quick asides to each other.)
Next up, it's time to take Jack to get an anti-possession tattoo. Jack at first, throws the poor tattoo artist, because it hurts. Dean tells him to suck it up, and Jack understands that "pain is a part of the complete human experience, accepting it is a sign of maturity" which is perhaps not necessarily the lesson Dean wanted him to learn there? But anyway, he lets the tattoo artist do his thing, but then afterwards it just insta-heals... so, that was a waste of everyone's time.
Furthermore, a demon sees them on their way out. So, that sucks.
Back at the motel, the argument breaks out anew, with Donatello joining in - it's the Nature versus Nurture debate, after all, and he's was a philosophy prof wasn't he? Maybe I'm misremembering. Anyway, things get a little heated - but also pretty awesome. I especially like Donatello joining Dean's side and saying "It's like teaching a lion not to be a lion!" and Sam immediately dismissing that argument for the false equivalence that it is "he's not a lion, he's human!" And just, the way Sam says it is awesome - Jared just puts so much disgust in his voice for the idea of ignoring Jack's humanity. OF COURSE, that being said, Sam is only 50% right, Jack is also an angel... BUT, an angel is not necessarily Lucifer, and angel could also be Castiel... and I think that's where the genius of Jack CHOOSING Castiel as his father in the first episode comes in, because (and SPN is big on this) your family is who you CHOOSE it to be, not necessarily whose DNA most resembles yours.
Anyway, I'm getting completely off track, I just loved that line and Jared's acting there.
In the midst of this argument, Jack gets upset and peaces the fuck outta there - instantly. So, he can indeed teleport, but it seems as instinctual as his self-defense move.
He ends up outside by the dumpster, thinking about his mother and how much she loved him. Guess it sucks that he can't bring people back from the dead, because he probably really wishes she were around.
Sam finds him, and they have a great chat. Jack knows that Dean is angry at him for some reason, and Sam takes the time to explain that Dean's not really angry - that Dean has a tendency to get frustrated, and then it all gets mixed up with anger and fear in his head. Jack wonders what Dean could be afraid of, and Sam explains that Dean needs to protect everyone, but he's afraid because he has to protect Jack, but he might also have to protect other people FROM Jack. And MAN, this is great, because you can see Sam firmly placing Jack in the S2 Sam role... and, while the situation is different (Dean doesn't love Jack), he's not altogether wrong. Dean IS taking his fear and turning it into anger. I mean, that's what people are really good at, after all.... if you're afraid of someone, or a group of someones, then it's easy to turn that fear into hatred instead. I mean, that's taking it to an extreme allegory, but it's not that far off. It's easier for Dean to hate Jack then it is for him to admit that he's afraid of him because he doesn't understand what or who he is as a person.
Jack wonders if he's even worth any of this - and Sam tells him that Kelly, Cas, and Sam all think so. AWwwww... I love Sam.
Meanwhile, Dean is drinking in the hotel bar. And the bartender lady starts SUSPICIOUSLY TALKING TO HIM. And sure enough, it's Asmodeus, as we discover when Dean leaves and we see the bartender is actually dead behind the counter and not busing tables. And my notes say "Oh man.... also what the hell?" which really tells me what I was thinking there, thanks crappy notes. I think because at this point, I was like "demons are shapeshifters now?"
Then it's morning!
Donatello comes into Sam's room and we get a bit of exposition. Firstly, we find out that Jack slept in Donatello's room the night before, so as to put distance between him and Dean. Then we get a little Nephilim lore - and we find out that apparently Niphilim are always stronger than the angels that sired them (also, do no angels ever assume the mother's role? Or does this just confirm that all angels are men? Or are we using the word "sire" in a weird gender neutral sense that it normally doesn't have?) Anyway, I liked this addition to the lore, because it makes things make a little more sense - as to WHY Jack is so powerful, when the other Niphilim we met was super easy for Cas to kill (or at least, relatively easy.) It also explains why Jack is so much more powerful than Lucifer, and is the most powerful thing in all of Creation at the moment (aside from God and Amara, I guess!) Since Lucifer and Michael were the two strongest angels, and Jack is now stronger than they are.
Anyway, this whole time, I'm sitting there watching and thinking "Pretty sure Donatello is actually Asmodeus" ... and I WASN'T WRONG!
But we don't get that reveal until after another scene with Mary. Mary meets another human, who apparently hasn't seen a woman in a while... and sure enough, once she proves she's not an angel or a demon, he gets his creep-on and when she resists, he nearly shoots her in the face. Lucifer then punches him through the chest - which is nice, and something I've always wished I could do, though I'd wear gloves, because the idea of... stringy people bits...getting under my fingernails is pretty disgusting. ANYWAY, my weird high school fantasies aside...
Sam and Dean are continuing their argument. And then Donatello arrives and YUP, I was right. It's now time to hunt for Jack! But then DEMONS ATTACK. And we get a cool fight scene with Dean and a demon in the motel room - which is actually pretty sexy, when Dean gets his thighs wrapped around the guys head and then gets thrown onto a bed... like, wow. Apparently there is a new fight co-ordinator this year, and so far I LIKE THEM VERY MUCH!
Sam saves the day by knifing the demon in the back - then they run to go find Donatello, who is being held against the wall. Then Dean throws an angel blade with amazing force and precision AS IF THIS COULD GET SEXIER! And then quips 'housekeeping is not going to like this"... I love Dean.
Jack, as it turns out, is with fake Donatello aka Asmodeus. He's trying to tell him that God told him to tell Jack that he should free these old warriors from a cage in the earth... basically, trying to use Jack to free the Shadeem. And like, Asmodeus, listen to Lucifer on this one? Like, if Lucifer couldn't control those fuckers, what makes you think you can? Prideful, I guess. Jack doesn't know any better, so starts to do the thing.
Sam, Dean, and Donatello race to find him. They are in Jasper Wyoming, which Sam tells us is where a devil's gate is located - but it's one that goes down to a particularly nasty bit of hell where particularly nasty things are. Also, Sam is amazing that he can read in the car like that - I guess at this point it's just a lifetime of training, but I haven't been able to read in the car since I turned 20. I get sick just glancing at a map.
Back with Mary - they run into a group of angels, who inform Lucifer that he's dead. And then after Lucifer kills them, Michael shows up.
Sam and Dean arrive and shout at Jack to stop what he's doing. Asmodeus reveals himself and then starts choking out Sam and Dean (and Donatello) and Jack is like "YOU'RE HURTING MY FRIENDS!" and gets super pissed. Here, my notes just say "aww baby" but what that means is that the pit to hell closes and Asmodeus flees before Jack can do anything to him in his wrath.
Lucifer greets Michael, and says that he looks like "the cheap knock-off to the one I left behind" which I think sets up nicely an exploration into Lucifer and Michael's relationship - because already Lucifer seems DISAPPOINTED that this isn't actually Michael.
Then they break into fisticuffs... and Michael gets Lucifer in a lock, but then says that "maybe I need you" so... we have Lucifer keeping Mary around because he might need her, and Michael keeping Lucifer around because he might need him? You know, maybe we should just teach this in schools - never kill anyone, you might need them.... also, what would Mr. Rogers do? :P
Back at the Bunker, Sam and Dean discuss the problem that is Asmodeus. Then Sam tries to get Dean to come to some sort of truce about Jack, but Dean isn't having it. As far as Dean's concerned, the kid might "sneeze and kill us" and he's dangerous. Dean then leaves to go to bed, and he hears weird sounds... which he follows to Jack's room, where Jack is repeatedly stabbing himself, and then healing.
Dean marches in there and makes him stop. And it very much is "I have to protect you" motion and tone of voice when he stops him. Then Dean seems to remember himself... Jack tells him his legit fear that he's so different from humans, that maybe he WILL hurt someone and that Dean is right. Dean tells him that if Dean's right about him, "and it comes to killing you, I'll be the one to do it." And I mean, yes, it's not at all comforting, it's threatening, and it IS in danger of alienating Jack and turning him against the Winchesters as people who he is NOT safe with... but on the other hand, it might actually be the opposite and exactly what Jack wants to hear? I mean, Dean made Cas promise to kill him when he had the Mark of Cain... maybe it's actually COMFORTING to Jack to hear that someone will make sure he doesn't hurt anyone? I guess time will tell, but I'm not necessarily seeing that conversation as strictly foreboding.
And that's where the episode ends!
Next week, looks like we start with Wayward set-up... that'll be fun!
As usual, let me know what you thought in comments!
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