Once again, wine was had. Things aren't going to be super accurate, but unless I ask, don't bother correcting me - it's just annoying. At least this time I got names (I think.)
Let's get to it!
ETA: So, I looked it up after the fact, and this was a Leming-Buckner episode, which explains why it fell a little flat for me... I will say though (since you always gotta balance out the negative with the positive) - that I think they did a good job of writing Cas in this episode, usually that's a weak spot of theirs, but I enjoyed the moments we had with him this time. So, yay!
So, we start off with Sam sleeping with Toni (aka: UKMoL). They are chatting jovally about American Hunters. This is where me and my friends try to figure out whose fantasy we're in, hers or Sam's - and if it's Sam's just what drugs she gave him to have his mind go HERE of all places.
Then we cut to Dean, who is in the Bunker talking to Cas, who is in Aldrich Missouri. It kinda doesn't make sense to me that Dean would go back to the Bunker rather than stay out on the road while he looked for Sam. But, you know, whatever? How far away is Aldrich anyhow? I'mma look it up - 6 hours! (And it looks pretty) Well, I guess that's like... relatively close? Maybe Dean just figured it'd be MORE awkward to share a motel room with his mum, so he decided to go back to the Bunker to sleep. Who knows, it's a mystery.
Anyway, he tells Cas, who seems to be standing under the Iron Workers Bridge - which means he's RIGHT BESIDE the entrance to the Bunker IRL (HA!) , to check out real estate purchases and rentals and then get back to him. Cas is like "okelydokely" and then Dean does the cutest thing and actually treats Cas like a human BFF - and tells him how awkward things are with Mary and how he's not sure what to do, and all his concerns and worries - and Cas is like "I am grossly underprepared for this conversation" but he still gives solid advice, which is to "don't make things needlessly complicated." Which, you know, is pretty much the Winchester MO when it comes to emotions, so I doubt Dean will listen to him - but sound advice, Cas, sound advice. You might be cut out for this BFF 4eva role after all!
Then Dean hangs up and Mary walks into the room, and woops! She overheard! Haha, maybe don't have your private phone conversations in the most cavernous echoey room in the entire Bunker, Dean? Just a thought. But Mary is cool with it - she talks about how Dean shouldn't worried about overwhelming her, that she'll catch up.
Then she talks about the real problem being that she doesn't know how she's going to face Sam - because the YED was HER fault. Which... SHE KNOWS! I mean, geez, can we get more exploration of that please? The fact that she KNOWS now that she sold her son up the river? I mean, yeah, it wasn't specified, but geez... poor Mary. Little does she know that Sam doesn't really care all that much - plus, I think both boys chalk it up to her being manipulated by TPTB, just like they were until they got wise and broke away.
Back to Sam, who is still in bed with the enemy - Toni is talking about a theory she has that the American Hunters are compromised somehow, working with monsters, I guess. Then Sam starts to come out of the hallucination, and we find out that this is indeed happening in Sam's mind, and is a combo of drugs and spellwork, and she KNOWS exactly the scenario she had tricked him into... so, basically, Toni just mind-raped a rape victim. So...that's great...I've got no problem with that...Good job.(/sarcasm.)
And since the whole mind-rape didn't work, it's back to old fashioned torture! Yay.
Listen, on a serious note, as much as I appreciate the slow drag of the knife up Sam's chest, neck, and lowerlip.... the whole rapey-vibe kinda spoiled it for me. I REALLY think people should stop raping Sam, whether it's in his mind or not. (And as Dumbledore says - just because something is in your mind, doesn't mean it's not real.)
Anyway, let's go back to Dean, who isn't in a storyline that is on my "NO THANK YOU" list.
Mary has woken up in the morning, and she's been dreaming about memories of John, and she mentions what a great father he was. AWKWARD.
Cas saves the day by calling and telling Dean that he may have found Sam. I do like the fact that he leads with the investigation that led him to the farm, and not the pretty conclusive evidence that the place is heavily warded. That was a nice moment of humour.
Mary wants to come along, and Dean tries to do the protective thing and tell her to stay back, but she's not having that. Yay Mary!
Sam's still being tortured. Toni wants to know names and locations of hunters, and the passcords to all the MoL databases. And she also wants to know about his relationship with Ruby. Yes, let's bring up PREVIOUS DUBIOUS CONSENT RELATIONS, ugh.
But, hey, at least some dude named Mick calls her, having discovered her dead associate, and he seems to suggest that she might be in trouble. So that's something. That being said - isn't "Mick" a LITTLE on the nose for an Irish dude?
Then we cut to Rowena! She's dating some dude who looks REALLY FAMILIAR. Was he on the show before? (
Then we cut to Vince Vincente (which I hope is a chosen name, rather than a given one, otherwise that ranks up there with my Dad wanting to call my brother Sven Svensson - a fate he thankfully escaped, given our last name isn't even Svensson.)
Vince is obviously going to be Lucifer's next vessel, but first we gotta meet him. We find out that although he is happy on stage, once the show is over, he is a sad mopey guy, because his girlfriend is dead, and he refuses to go out and party with his buddy Tommy. (Which I was going to make a joke about guitarists named Tommy, but then I realized that I was getting Billy Tallent (Hard Core Logo) confused with Perfect Tommy (Buckeroo Bonzai) - was Perfect Tommy a guitarist? You can answer that.) Anyway, Tommy is sadly not Billy Tallent and I'll stop now, with obscure old and/or Canadian movie references.)
Back to Dean! Him and Mary are driving... So, this is where Timeline stuff doesn't make sense, because even though Aldrich is only 6 hours away and Mary JUST woke up, when Dean and her drive there, it's night again...so, what the heck did they do with the day? Or did Mary not sleep at night? Maybe they stayed up late talking about angel manipulation, and didn't get to bed until 9am, and now it's 6pm and Mary's just waking up again. I guess that's one thing about living in a place with no winders* (*WINDOWS... but I just love that I wrote "winders" so much that I have to leave it. You have to understand that I type phonetically, so I wrote "winders" because that is legit what I said it as in my head. I am, apparently, a hick when I drink.)
Anyway, Dean and Mary are chatting again, as they are wont to do these days... and Mary says Dean has to do what she says because she's his mother. NICE! Hahaha, very reminiscent of Dean telling Sam he had to do what he said because he's the big brother. Anyway... Mary talks about how Hunters all end up the same way. Dean tries to ease Mary into the idea that Dad changed a little after her death - and threw himself into Huntering - and Dean basically did the same. But then he talks (kinda proud-like, oh Dean) about how Sam got out for a bit and went to Stanford. Mary asks why the heck Sam came back to hunting if he was out - and Dean tells her that when John went missing, Sam and he realized that all they really had was each other. (Awww... but you really gotta tell her about the fated apocalypse thing, Dean, that ACTUALLY explains it.)
Back to Vince, who is apparently staying at a hotel that is a holodeck. (For the record, that was my friend's observation, mine was "that wallpaper is really trippy.") He goes to wash his hands, and BLOOD comes out of the tap, and then he puts it all over his face. GROSS!!
Then the Blood is weirdly gone, and Lucifer appears to him as his dead girlfriend.
Guys... Lucifer really has a destrinct MO, doesn't he. It's always - "blood" then "dead girlfriend/wife offering peace and/or revenge." I guess if you find something that works... still, at this point, you gotta wonder if it's some sort of fetish.
Anyway, we find out that poor Jen died of suicide after feeling neglected. Awww, poor everyone involved in that. Lucifer offers peace and doesn't explain WHICH angel he is, and Vince of course agrees to be a vessel. So...yeah, bye Vince!
Back to Rowena!
Crowley is blackmailing her hard - he doesn't want her to just find Lucifer, he also wants her to put Lucifer back in the cage.
Back to Sam at the farm.... NOPE! CAS out by his stolen trunk full of hay. CAS! RETURN THAT TRUCK AND HAY! I feel so bad for that farmer dude.
Anyway, Dean pulls up once again argues that Mary should let him go in alone. Mary conceeds that Dean can keep her from driving, but he can't keep her from hunting. But then Cas jumps in, like a good BFF, and convinces her to keep him company since he's trapped outside the wards.
Back to Lucifer, who isn't interested in rehersal and throws Tommy through a door - RUDE!
Back to Dean, who walks into a trap. Good one, Dean.
But we get to see Sam's reaction when Toni drags Dean into the room - Dean's alive! Yay!
Back to Lucifer... who goes to Crowley's lair, presumably because Crowley called him there. Crowley tells him that he figured he'd inhabit Bieber rather than Vince Vincente (*cough*Rick Springfield*cough*) (speaking of, Aldrich MO is right next to Springfield MO, apropros of nothing.) Lucifer calls Crowley mad or dim. Crowley tries to convince Lucifer to take over Heaven instead of Hell, but that's just a diversion for Rowena to start a paralyzing spell and then Crowley throws "top shelf" supheric acid on him ("as opposed to bottom shelf supheric acid?" I ask the two bio-chemists I always watch Supernatural with, they shrug.)
Sam and Dean are now both being tortured. The family who gets tortured together...
Toni asks Dean about "Benjamin Lafitte" ie: Benny... and Dean is like "what's with everyone bringing up ex-lovers?" And I'm like, "I don't know Dean, seems to be the theme of the show." And he's like "You can't actually talk to me and I didn't really say that." And I'm like "Ugh, you're no fun."
Back to Lucifer... Rowena's spell to send him back to the cage doesn't work. He flashes his wings, heals his face, and Crowley flees - leaving behind Rowena to take the fall for the plan. Nice one, Crowley.
In my mind though, this is so they can set up the idea that Crowley will once again only have the Winchesters to turn to in order to help him... so, it makes sense that he abandons his only (forced) ally.)
Sam and Dean get a chance to talk while Toni makes herself tea. Sam's super jazzed that Dean's alive! Yay! Dean promises he'll tell him everything about it once they get out of there. Sam then fills Dean in quick about who Toni is. Then it's more torture time...
But Mary comes in to save the day! Unfortunately, she should really shoot first and save later... but nope, her and Toni get into a fist fight, and then Toni uses a spell on her... and then for some reason the spell will keep going if Toni's dead, but not if she's unconcious? Why doesn't anyone KILL THEIR ENEMIES! Frustrating!
Mick shows up though, so I guess it's just as well that they didn't shoot his colleage right in front of him? Maybe he would have shot them too? Who knows... though, he later says he's unarmed... but he could be lying.
Anyway, Mick's brought Cas inside. He promises that Toni will be reprimanded in the UK and that he's just there to reach out an "olive branch" - Sam and Dean obviously find that hard to believe, given their treatment thus far. He argues that he wouldn't have brought in their attack-dog (Cas) if he meant them harm. And I like the line where he says that Cas could probably kill him without breaking a sweat, and Cas replied "I don't sweat under any circumstances"... ha!
Mick tell them to think it over and call him. Seriously, does he really think they'll call him? I don't know, it's the Winchesters, so maybe they will eventually out of some weird idiocy... but I really think Toni screwed the pooch here if they wanted willing cooperation.
Back to the Bunker! Mary has "made" dinner by pointing at take-out items on take-out menus, and we learn that Mary doesn't know how to cook. (Awww, that's okay, Mary, Dean does!) She also doesn't bake pie, she hands Dean a storebought one, which he then devours.
Sam, meanwhile, is freaking out about the fact that his mother is alive. Mary tries to fit in by suggesting they "call the internet" about the UKMoL, and it's another moment of levity.
Lucifer now has Rowena at his feet, much against her will. She wants to leave, but Lucifer wants to use her.
Back at the Bunker, Sam visits Mary in her room, awkwardly bringing her a cup of tea ("Moms like tea, right?" Sam asks himself, while he tries to select the most Mom-like teacup in the cupboard.)
Sam tells her that he knows what it's like to come back and not feel like you fit. (And OUCH MY HEART. Because Sam's really only "come back" once, and that was after the cage, and I really don't think we adequately explored the ramifications of the cage on Sam... it's either that, or he meant after he was away at Stanford, but I doubt that, because he just missed 3-4 years there and Dean and John were just business as usually during that time - not like post-cage Sam, who missed a 1.5 years of Dean's life, and some soulless shenanigans.)
Anyway, Mary talks about how she's just trying to fill in the blanks - the biggest one being all the mother-stuff that she missed, like first tooth, first girlfriend, etc. (Sam's a little sheepish at that, because I'm pretty sure his first kiss was the Kitsune that Dean later killed because he was projecting his issues about Cas betraying them... awkward!)
Sam hands Mary Dad's journal, and suggests that it might help fill in the blanks for her.
She asks him why it was that he returned to hunting after having successfully left it. Sam says that it's his family - and his family hunts - Mary does not look pleased by that answer.
Sam then tells Mary that just having her back fills in the biggest blank for Sam... and then they hug, and Sam does the scrunched up "I will remember this hug forever" face, and it's all heartbreaking.
Then we do a music fadeout, with Dean sitting on the floor of the kitchen, drinking and looking at childhood pictures of Mary. Mary begins to read John's journal, getting emotional just at seeing his military pins in the front (and yeah, John JUST died for her, so this is going to be tough.) And Sam is having a moment as he stars at his ceiling fan.
Meanwhile, off in a car somewhere, Mick is berating Toni for using vinegar when they needed honey. She argues that they'll probably have to destory the Winchesters anyway, if they plan to secure the US, because the Winchesters are just as bad as the monsters they hunt. Mick agrees that it's a possibility and that he'll do it if push comes to shove. He's already, apparently, called in "Mr. Catch" for the dirty work.... so, that bodes well.
We see "Mr. Catch" (which I saw on some speculations might be Mr. KETCH) packing his guns and torturey stuff into black suitcases in London. So.. yeah, boding SUPER WELL her guys!
And that's the show!
As per usual, let me know what you think in comments!