Disclaimer: I've watched the show once, while drinking. I took notes only so much as to remember the general order of events/scenes. All quotes are paraphrased. Things are not going to be remembered exactly. Don't correct me unless it's a major plot/character point or I ask you to.
Annnnnnnnnnd, in we go.....
We're still in Superior, Nebraska - which, incidentally, is still only an hour or two away from the Bunker, so really, the fact that Sam isn't just saying "screw this, I'm going home" really says a lot about his character.
But, yes, we get this great scene of a croatoan/darkness "infected" making his way through town, while SOMEONE (*cough*Sam*cough*) hits up a hardware store and... and then we see Sam lure the guy into an alley by playing Night of the Hunter on his iphone.
My friend knew that it was Night of the Hunter - I've never seen the film, but according to my friend, it is about a smooth talking good looking priest (Robert Mitchum) who is actually a terrifying murderer. Later, my friend realized that while that theme didn't reflect Sam at all, it DID reflect Crowley. So, that was cool. But I'm getting ahead of myself. (Also, Sam has Night of the Hunter on his phone for some reason.)
Sam is trying electro-shock therapy... or, he's just knocking the thing out. I love how he asks him if he can talk first - it's important to carefully screen your experimental lab subjects.
DEAN! Dean is dropping the deputy off at her nan's house. The deputy narrates the neighbourhood for Dean and points at the house she had her first kiss and then she points somewhere else for where she lost her virginity, and Dean is like "bet the house was pissed" and the deputy was like "oh, she was." And I'm wondering if the deputy was referring to the house itself as a she, or if we just got a lesbian/bi character introduced to us all too briefly. I mean, on the one hand, she does end up dying, but on the other hand, so does everyone, so I think it'd still count as a good representation move where Supernatural is concerned. When EVERYONE dies, you can't really fault them for killing off everyone. (but we should probably steer clear of that debate.)
Anyway, Dean is all cooey with the baby. And it's cute and all, but at this point, my notes legit say "Feed the baby!" because I don't even have kids and I know that babies that small have to eat like every 2 hours, and I haven't even seen them buy formula...
Back to Sam!
Sam opens what I thought was a wet wipe and then eats it. So...apparently pills in America are packaged differently? Someone fill me in, please. Was that a recognizable thing to Americans? Because I swear to god, in Canada only wet wipes come in those kinds of packages. I just don't think eating wet wipes is the answer to Sam's problems.
Anyway, Sam interrogates the dude... and by interrogates, I mean asks him nicely for information and then gives him pudding when he requests some. Take note that this was a very effective way for Sam to get information.
Dean tries to call Cas, but Cas has been strung up by angels. Poor Cas!
We get Ephram and Jonah. I swear we've had Ephram before... I'mma look it up....hmmm... okay, maybe I was confused with Inias? I guess Ephram is new. I don't even know if I'm spelling that correctly. Probably not.
Anyway, Ephram and Jonah are DOUCHNOZZLES. I mean, seriously... all studies show that no legit information ever results from torture, and also Cas was totally willing to play ball with most information if you'd just HELP HIM. Guys, people want to be HELPED. If you offer people help, like, legit help, they will be more willing to help you in return, it's BASIC PSYCHOLOGY. Anyway, the angels actually do figure this out, but they go about it in the most ass hattery way possible...and we'll get to that.
Back at the farm house, the baby kindly asks to be fed by embedding blocks in the wall. SEE! I TOLD YOU TO FEED THE BABY! I'M RIGHT!
Of course, the grandmum is a religious... person (I was about to use another word, but then realized that some of my readers are religious people and I was about to be unnecessarily offensive... and yeah, in this universe it's not even like she's completely crazy to call an exorcist... but again, we'll get to that.)
I loved the joke of "Who are you going to call?" and Dean picking up his phone with "Ghostbusters." Hehehe
Dean does a very impressive u-turn, given the boat of a car that he's driving.
We get another lie-filled call (on Sam's end) between Sam and Dean, but at least they're talking. :P
Meanwhile, Cas is being tortured. So... doesn't stabbing angels with the angel blade KILL THEM. I mean, Cas once killed an angel by driving PART of an angel blade into an angel's EYE. Yet, for some reason, they can stab Cas in the shoulder AND the stomach, and he comes out fine. It's very bizzare.... though, it DOES lend credence to my headcanon that Castiel was designed to always be, that he is, in fact, immortal and designed for the sole purpose of being a spanner in the works.
Cas calls for "mercy, brother" and the angels argue against him - asking if he's really an angel. Cas says he is, but the angels point out that when given the choice between Heaven and the Winchesters, Castiel chooses the Winchesters every time... so can he really be called an Angel of the Lord, or brother, without serving Heaven? Big questions that tie back into Metatron's similar questions to Castiel last season... if Cas is neither angel nor man, what is he is? Does he HAVE to be anything or is he simple Castiel: Professional Spanner.
Back to Sam!
Someone is singing O Death in the hospital and it is pretty... and so is she!!
It's a reaper! Sam gets a pretty reaper of his own, just like Dean did! Only, Billy (Billie?) is pissed off. She seems to confirm that Dean killed Death (though I still maintain that killing Death is impossible and that Death has merely decided that he doen't want to be involved in shenanigans anymore, and has told all his reapers to keep up the ruse.)
But then she delivers a message to Sam that it's over - them always being brought back from the dead. Apparently the "old Death thought it was funny" - which, awesome and hilarious. But, Billy is sick of the Winchesters messing up the world, so apparently the next time they die, they're going to be tossed "out into the empty" - and AWESOME!!!! Oh man, that totally jives with the way that I see the structure of the SPN universe.
Anyway, Billy/Billie is awesome and I love her. If she's the new death, then I don't mind that the old death is gone - though he's NOT DEAD. Billy and Sam should be friends. I have decided. They could fall in love and get married and have beautiful beautiful babies.... or they could just be friends... or frenemies... or just remain awesomely neutral at each other. I don't care. I'm getting off track.
Cas and the angels recap the end of last season for us - Metatron escaped, Metatron is human, Metatron tricked Cas yet again, etc. Then it's more torture time, even though TORTURE IS NOT A LEGIT WAY TO GET INFO. Geez.
But then it's Hannah to the rescue!! I love Hannah, and her new vessel is awesome and I really like the actor who plays her, because he does such a good job of being CARING with his big caring eyes...
(So, sidenote, in an earlier commercial break, my friend and I were talking about another friend of hers named Dean (40+), who is dating a younger man... and we were trying to guess how young and if it was scandalous or not...and while Cas was getting tortured, my friend stalked the boyfriend on fb and found out his birthdate, so, right as the scene ended and it went to commercial or whatever, my friend was like "Dean's boyfriend is 29!" - and my brain, who was watching a show with a character named Dean, and had just looked at a scene with Hannah looking lovingly at Cas, got SUPER CONFUSED and thought that Hannah's vessel was 29, but then realized that Hannah wasn't dating Dean - and then realized that Dean didn't have a boyfriend - and then realized that my friend was talking about IRL Dean. Anyway, you all need to know this because of something funny later that you had to be there for, but I'm going to tell you anyway...)
Back to Sam! Sam is going to the chapel to pray. Sam prays to God directly (best to bypass angels) and we find out that it's "been a long time", so that answers the question of whether Sam lost his faith completely or not... he did, at least, partially. Sam, true to Sam, prays for DEAN...geeeezus, Sam, you're killing me here. Dean deserves better, Sam thinks - he wants Dean to have a life. Sam's made peace with dying, so if God wants to kill Sam, that's cool. Also, Sam feels bad for setting the darkness free, even if he doesn't regret saving his brother - and he doesn't want people to die because of him.
Anyway, the short of it is that Sam asks for a sign. Personally, I would have aimed higher and asked for a solution. I think that at this point I said that out loud. And that's when my friend said, "he should have asked for a 29 year-old boyfriend." And we laughed and laughed.
But GOD ACTUALLY ANSWERS SAM! Sam sees visions of himself getting tortured (and my god, why do they have to include eye-stuff! I DON'T LIKE EYE-STUFF)... and Sam collapses in the hallway and yells what we're all thinking "WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?!!?!"
And I LOVE IT... I mean, only Sam could ask for a sign, get one, and then TALK BACK. I love him.
Also, I guess I'm just optimistically assuming it was God - it could be something completely different and sinister that's going to suck in an epic plot twist no one sees coming - except for me, right here, in a paranoid fit.
BUT BUT BUT... I've seen a lot of speculation about how Lucifer is technically the LIGHT BRINGER and also the original lock for the Darkness, and there was a mention of the cage last week...and Sam seeing himself getting tortured... like he was in the CAGE... like he was by LUCIFER.... dun dun DUN!
Meanwhile, back at the ranch, Dean has arrived to find that Jenna's gran has called an "exorcist" and he walks in to find that the exorcist is CROWLEY! You know, even with the spoiler preview of Crowley in the collar, I still forgot and was delightely surprised, so I would like to take this moment to thank my brain for being a forgetful sieve sometimes.
Crowley then says that he knows Dean because Dean was a particularly "scrumptious young alter boy" - and, on the one hand, I did laugh, on the other hand... molested alter boy jokes shouldn't be funny, everyone is horrible and if I believed in it, we'd all be going to hell.
Dean is so pissed, you guys (-that is literally what my notes say.)
Back to Cas and Hannah! Hannah can't heal Cas of the curse, and it's super sad.
Back to Dean and Crowley! Uh... wait, my notes don't make sense here. Are we still with Hannah and Cas? Let's just say that we are, if there's something with Dean and Crowley, it can wait... Hannah tells Cas about the alarms that are going off in Heaven that have never gone off before and no one knows what they mean.
Oh, I know, back at the ranch, Jenna is checking on the baby - and we get Cas' voice over about what the Darkness is, and that's why my notes are confusing. Cas explains the Darkness to Hannah, and they have this exchange:
Hannah: "God help us"
Cas: "I wouldn't count on that."
- And I LOVE IT. I love the fact that Castiel is an angel who has lost all faith in God, but gained faith in humanity (wherein "humanity" is represented by the Winchesters and/or Dean specifically.)
- I also love that he can can still count himself an angel while not having faith in God. It reminds me of Anna, back in her awesomest episode, and possibly my favourite line in SPN, which is when she responds to Uriel's "there is no god" with "maybe, maybe not, but there's still me." I still maintain that before Anna was reprogrammed/tortured/driven-insane in Heaven, she was far more advanced in her belief system than Cas still is.
Then Cas suddenly realizes that something isn't jiving... because how did Hannah know to find and rescue him?
Back to Dean and Crowley - we find out that Crowley uses the bad priests and gets them to give him a heads up if there's rogue demons in the area. And then he comes in as an "exorcist" and reprimands them or what have you. Crowley doesn't know what he's dealing with here, but he knows it's ancient and evil. He also recognizes that Dean is oddly attached to it.
Back to Cas and Hannah - Cas realizes that it was a set-up. The angels were supposed to torture him, so that Hannah could come in as the white knight and get the information through kindness. Ooo, again, they've learnt that kindness works better than torture, yet they've used this information in a way that STILL USES TORTURE. Geez... guys, not cool. And it sucks, because Hannah seemed to be a moral angel.
But then, it seems that she may have been out voted... because the other angels say "that's how democracy works" and it makes me wonder if that's a quip or if Heaven has actually established a democracy. Interesting. Anyway, Hannah explained that the other angels hate Castiel... sadness.
And then we find out that since Hannah's kindness didn't work, it's time for the brain hack!
Back to the ranch, and Jenna has become a murderer. At first I was wondering if Jenna was the new Darkness and it had lept vessels or something...
Castiel is getting his noggin drilled into... and the angels don't REALLY know what they're doing, because the one of them only watched Naiomi "once" - ouch, but nice callback to a previous character and the shows own mythology.
Hannah tries to get them to stop and they start beating her up, and then Castiel gets super hulk mad and pops the pins in his head ala Samandriel back in the day, and then goes to TOWN...only Hannah gets killed NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!
I liked Hannah, you guys. Ugh, STOP KILLING GOOD ANGELS! :( Sad times forever.
Sam is dying while all this is happening. It suxors for him. While he's dying, he runs through all the info he's amassed... the Reaper telling him that he's "unclean in the biblical sense" and then his internet research or purification rituals... and at first I was wondering if the reaper was hinting a the demon blood as being a source for the cure, but if that were the case (ala croatoan virus) then Sam wouldn't have been infected in the first place. What she meant was the opposite - that holy oil is the answer. Sam lights some on fire, and at first I was wondering if he had to swallow it, because that's a good way to burn your insides and die - but nope, you just have to hold the fire close to your skin. Yay! No burns!
Back with Dean and Crowley, and Dean explains about the Darkness (I think?) and then they have a hilarious exchange where Dean calls Crowley Velma from Scooby Doo and Crowley argues that he's Daphne. Anyway, I laughed.
Dean discovers that it is indeed a Darkness baby!
Meanwhile, Sam is luring the Infected to the chapel with the clever use of Sugar Shack played on a boom box... I'm just going to go ahead and assume that Sam found that boombox and tuned it to the first radio station he found... because although we don't know much about Sam's taste in music, Sugar Shack just doesn't strike me as Sam's jam.
He uses a holy oil ring of fire to cure them, and it works! Yay! Sam successfully saves people!! He actually very rarely does that. Usually Sam's MO is to fail spectacularly and have it stand as a metaphor for how he constantly fails to save his brother.
Dean and Crowley find Jenna and discover that she is soulless! So, the Darkness eats soulles apparently and I officially take back all my demands that they simply feed her to solve their problems.
We also discover that when she DOES eat a soul, she can age rapidly. So, now we're dealing with another creepy kid sized enemy.
(Also, sidenote, when the Deputy Jenna arrived, her grandmother said that she got Jenna's FATHER's old crib set up - which makes her Jenna's paternal grandmother... and yet, Amara finds a girls dress in the storage bin of kids stuff. So.... Jenna either has Aunts, or her father used to look like a little girl. Which, you know, is possible, and certainly adds an interesting dynamic to the family (which is sadly apparently completely wiped out)
Crowley kills Jenna, which pisses Dean off - but honestly, what were you going to do? Her soul has been EATEN. I don't think you can get it back.
Okay, so HERE is where Dean tells Crowley about the Darkness? Or how the kid is the Darkness? Or something, and Crowley is like "okay, I'll go kill her too" and Dean is like "Noooooooooo!" and then Crowley gets MAD and throws Dean into a closet and tells him that he isn't "your bloody sidekick!" And we see that the pissed off Crowley from last season at least PARTIALLY still exists.
Dean drives and angel blade through Crowley's hand, and pulls the demon knife, yet once again, doesn't attempt to kill Crowley with it. (I still maintain that it probably wouldn't work anyway, but it annoys me that Dean just keeps letting Crowley live... I mean, if he's playing the 'devil you know' game, fine, but just TELL US that's what you're doing.)
Then we get sort of vaguely middle-eastern themed techno music while Dean looks for the baby - which, while super cool, wasn't the usual tone of music that Supernatural employs, so it was notable.
The baby is gone, so Dean runs back to check on Crowley, but he's gone too! I mean, what did you expect Dean? Geez.
Finally, it's back to the bunker! Things are still a big mess. :(
Dean's telling Sam about what happened, but he can't quiet believe it, or he is downplaying it, and tells Sam that maybe he was just "seeing things" "like a vision" and SAm is like "*awkward laugh* visions... so... crazy."
Dean starts joking about how they should get a maid, who wears a little outfit and... but then he's cut off by the fact that there's someone behind the pile of books! It's CAS! He is not looking the best, but hey, at least he came home! Also, nice of him to interrupt that bad joke about the maid.
Then we cut to little creepy girl walking by herself down the street - and Crowley pulls up in a black van, opens the door to a family of tied up people, and offers her "candy" - ah Crowley.
And there we go! EPISODE OVER!
To sum up: Loved the fact that it at least APPEARS that God answered Sam's prayer. Loved Billie too. The Darkness is definitely shaping up to be an interesting villain... hopefully she stays that way. Kinda pissed that they killed Hannah, but I'll get over it, I guess. What else? Nope, that's about it. Death is alive, I don't care what you say. I love the fact that there's an "empty" and yeah... okay, I think that's it.
Next week is the episode that Jensen directed, so that should be fun!