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Title: Damned Demented Demons 19/32
Author: ME!
Fandoms: Supernatural/Harry Potter
Rating: PG-13 (for swearing)
Warnings: Spoilers for all Harry Potter books, Spoilers up to 4x17 for Supernatural (but takes place around 4x11).
Disclaimer: Sam and Dean belong to Kripke, Harry Potter belongs to Rowling.
A/N: I thought that the Battle of Hogwarts took place in Spring 1997...so that's what I based my timeline on. Since then I've seen that most sources have it in 1998. Ah well. In this story it's 1997. The events of the story take place sometime in early 2009.
A/N to chapter 19: I haven't written a thing all week. Thank goodness for buffers. Unfortunately, this week's chapter is just about getting from point A to point B. Next chapter will be far more interesting. I will try to get it to you sooner rather than later.

Summary: In which Dean gets Phil the day off and then there's a road-trip and some pie.

Chapter 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18

"What?" Dean said innocently. "Draco's a freakin' weird name, man...speaking of which, who the hell names their kid Scorpius? Seriously, if he wants the kid to make friends, he should have rethought that name choice. Kid sounds like he should either be battling Godzilla or leading a Dungeon Quest in his parents' basement."

Sam smiled and shook his head slowly.

"And on that note," Harry said, "we've got to leave before that guard wakes up. Dean, you're with Phil this time. I'm taking Sam."

"Oh hell no," Dean said, "I am not going on the Magic Wizard Vomit Ride again, and neither is Sammy. We'll steal a car and drive back to South Carolina before I..."

Harry sighed and walked up to Sam.

"...let you do that, last time you said something about splinching and..."

"What's splinching?" Sam looked down at Harry in concern, while Dean continued his rant,

"...I don't know what that is, but it sure as hell doesn't sound good..."

"Hopefully you won't find out," Harry said, and placed his hand on Sam's arm, "just think of the hotel room."

Harry turned and tugged Sam behind him through the dark tight nothingness. Phil was right, Sam really did pull wrong, at least now, Harry knew why.

*

"Son of a bitch!" Dean stared at the spot where Harry and his brother had just been. He swung his gaze over to Phil, who surprisingly looked as pissed off as he was.

"Fucking Harry Potter..." Phil was muttering under his breath, "get me killed, with his goddamn stunts and his goddamn distrust of authority, and who the hell even gave him a fuckin' job in the first place, for chrissakes, god help us all if he ever goes bad..." Finally Phil swung his gaze over to Dean warily, as if trying to decide if Dean was going to kill him or not.

"Let's get it over with," Dean said, walking up to Phil. "The sooner we get there, the sooner we can both kick Harry's ass."

Phil smiled and grabbed Dean's arm. Dean decided that anger would have to be a good enough distraction from nausea.

Once the hotel room swam back into focus, Dean immediately looked for Sam. He was sitting on the end of the bed, holding his head in his hands, but raised it a little at the sound of Dean appearing. Dean could see that he was fine, just pale and probably nauseated from the trip. Harry stood beside him, looking cautiously at Dean.

In the next second, Harry was pinned to the wall at eye-level, Dean's hands fisted in his shirt, with his feet dangling nearly a foot off the ground.

"Don't ever do that again," Dean ground out.

"Dean-" Sam voice came from behind him.

"I won't, I promise. I'm sorry," Harry said in a rush before Sam could say anything else. Dean studied Harry's eyes for a moment, and all he saw was sincerity and wariness. Dean lowered Harry back to the ground and let go of his shirt.

When he turned back to the room, Sam was staring at him angrily. Dean shut him up with a glare.

"Phil's angry at you too," Dean said, "You might want to apologize."

"Phil, I'm really sorry," Harry said. Dean looked over at Phil, who was looking a little bit wide-eyed, as if someone had just dropped him inside the Twilight Zone.

"Um, apology accepted, sir," Phil replied.

"You're dismissed for the remainder of your shift, and you can take tomorrow off too, if you like," Harry continued. "Go get some sleep. I'll check in with the team."

"No, you're staying here," Dean interrupted. Harry turned towards him in surprise.

"What?" Harry asked.

"Harry," Sam started, "there have already been two attempts to capture you tonight..."

"So, from here on out you aren't going anywhere without either me or Sam with you," Dean finished.

"That's ridiculous!" Harry said, "I'm the bloody Squad Commander, I can't-"

"And we're Hunters," Dean interrupted, "and if you want to stay alive, you'll do as we say."

"Is that a threat?" Phil asked.

"No, it's the truth," Sam replied calmly.

Dean picked up the spare pillow from his bed, and tossed it to Harry.

"Make your bed. We can fight about it more tomorrow," Dean said.

"I have to check in with the team," Harry stated, but Dean heard the tone behind it, and knew Harry wasn't fighting with him, he was asking permission.

"Call Deacon here then," Dean replied.

Harry put down the pillow and took out his communication mirror. Deacon appeared in the room a half minute later.

"Reporting, Sir," Deacon said as soon as he appeared. "Shortly after your departure last night, the Dementors began moving north. I deployed half the team to follow them, while the other half remained here, keeping the hotel secure, as per your orders. Last report from the mobile unit has the Dementors in Virginia, still heading north. There have been no further incidents of attacks on Muggles."

"Thanks, Deacon," Harry said. "Keep me apprised of any changes. Inform the team at the hotel that we'll be joining the other team in the morning."

Dean shifted on his feet only slightly and crossed his arms in a casual way. Harry's eyes flicked briefly towards him and then back to Deacon. Dean knew that he had gotten the message.

"I will be travelling separately," Harry said. "All communication will occur through the mirror, unless I ask for you to appear in person specifically."

"Yes, sir," Deacon responded.

"Alright, thanks Deacon," Harry finished. "You may go."

Once Deacon turned and disappeared. Harry turned to Phil.

"Could you find me a pensieve?" Harry asked.

"I thought you were giving me a day off," Phil replied.

"Yeah, I am," Harry said. "I'm asking you if, on your day off, you could find me a pensieve...since you'll have the time."

"Well, as long as we both understand that I have the day off..." Phil said rolling his eyes, but then gave Harry a significant look. "You sure you're alright here?" He asked. Dean knew what Phil was really asking. He knew that the wizard didn't trust Sam and him, and hell, he couldn't really blame the guy.

"Yes," Harry said. "Go on, I'll see you tomorrow."

"It's already tomorrow," Phil said, as he turned and disappeared as well.

"Now that I know how that disappearing thing feels, I can't believe you guys don't use doors more often," Dean said.

"I think they just like showing off in front of Muggles, personally," Harry smiled.

"What's a pensieve?" Sam asked

"You'll find out tomorrow," Harry responded, and changed the pillow Dean had thrown him earlier into a cot again then dropped down into it bonelessly.

"Oh hell no, you are not going to bed right now," Dean said. "I want to know what's in that file!"

"Oh!" Harry said rolling back off the cot and walking over to his shoulder bag. "I forgot."

"You forgot," Dean said incredulously. "You just spent he past five hours breaking into your own government, stealing files, and fighting demons, and you forgot the whole reason you went in there in the first place?"

"Well, you have to admit, it's been a long night," Harry said, and Dean could have sworn the guy was blushing a bit. "Besides, my main reason for breaking into the Department of Mysteries was to use the Chamber, so that you wouldn't be dependent on me for survival. The irony that I'm now apparently relying on you to protect me has not escaped my notice."

"Uh, yeah...thanks for that," Sam said, "and um, sorry about the demons."

Dean just rolled his eyes.

"Well, let's see it then," Dean said, and held out his hands for the thick folder that Harry had pulled out of his bottomless bag. Harry handed it over and Dean sat down at the small table, while Sam pulled the other chair around and practically pressed himself against Dean's side so that they could read at the same time.

"Shit...they know everything," Sam muttered. "How could they...it's all here. Yellow-eyes killing our Mom, the schools we went to...Stanford...Jess...the Shifter in St. Louis..."

"Yeah, Sammy, I am able to recognize my own life, you know," Dean said, hoping that Sam would shut up.

"How did they find out all this stuff?" Dean asked Harry.

"Divination, and some Muggle sources," Harry replied. "Looks like they got most of the early childhood information from your FBI files. As for the later stuff, they cite some source called 'Edlund', but I have no idea what that means."

Dean kept reading, the deal their Dad had made was in there...not the specifics, but the fact that he had summoned yellow-eyes and then Dean had lived, their Dad had died, and the colt had gone missing. The information was fairly solid, only missing a detail or two here and there, up until the entry about him going to hell, after that the information got a bit sketchy. Dean noticed that the 'Edlund' source was no longer being named, and figured that whatever that source was, it had somehow run out.

"But why are they so interested in us?" Sam asked. "Why gather this much informaton?"

Dean looked up at Harry and was surprised to see something flicker through his eyes briefly...something a little like fear.

"I don't know Sam, I think it must have something to do with whatever you guys are mixed up in now," Harry answered. "This Lilith demon, she must be a threat to us as well. Whatever is going on, the Department has somehow discovered that you two are involved, or maybe just that you might know what is going on. They must just be trying to determine how you are involved, and what you may know."

Dean considered this. They knew about his deal, and they knew that Lilith had held the contract, thanks to whoever or whatever this 'Edlund' source was, so maybe that was enough to make the connection that they knew what Lilith was doing. Yet, Harry had said that all the information had been gathered in the late summer...after he had...and that had nothing to do with Lilith, and there was nothing mentioned in the file about what Dean had done. The entries for the end of August and beginning of September were them trying to locate Sam and they don't mention him at all until some strange line saying, "Dean Winchester returns from dead. Human and alive. Method unknown."

"Listen," Harry said, "It's late, or, rather, early. We'll have plenty of time to look over the rest of the file tomorrow while we travel. Let's just get to sleep."

"You two go ahead," Dean said. "I'll keep reading."

"Not if you want to drive tomorrow, man," Sam said, and Dean looked up to see that familiar expression of poorly hidden concern. Once Dean's eyes met Sam's, Sam finished with, "Just try, alright?" and Dean knew that Sam knew how tired he was, and that he was only trying to put off the inevitable. All this time, he had hoped the dreams would stop, but they never did.

Normally, Dean would have told Sam to mind his own damn business and leave him alone, but he really didn't want to have Harry witness another fight between him and Sam. Harry was depending on them to keep him safe, and it wouldn't instill much confidence if they were at each other's throats over something as simple as whether or not Dean should go to bed.

"Fine, but only because driver picks the music," Dean said.

*

The next morning had them packing up and throwing their duffle bags in the Impala. Once Harry was finished in the bathroom, he just stood out of the way as Sam and Dean double checked their guns, armed themselves, and swept the room to make sure they hadn't left any trace of themselves behind. At the last minute, Harry remembered the alteration he had made to Sam's bed, and quickly reduced the mattress back to it's original size. Sam gave him a smile and Harry knew that as long as he was traveling with the Winchesters, he would be lengthening Sam's bed every time they stopped for the night.

Once the car was packed, Harry slid into the backseat without protest. Unlike most wizards, Harry knew the protocol when it came to cars - and knew that there was absolutely no contest for who rode in the front. At least he wasn't sharing the backseat with Dudley...instead he was sharing it with a stack of books, and the Winchester's clothing duffles - both dirty and clean. Sam at least apologized for that, telling him that the weapons stash in the trunk actually took up a lot of room, and they really had no choice.

"It's nice though, having the clothes there when you're sleeping, makes the bed a little wider," Sam added. Harry tried to picture Sam all scrunched up in the back of the car trying to sleep, and wondered how often they did that. Then he remembered Dean's memory of waking up pressed against a back door with Sam burrowed into him and their father driving, and figured they were probably did it more often than they cared to.

They stopped for breakfast an hour into the trip, when Dean recognized a diner and declared it to be one of his favorites.

"The one with the blueberry pie?" Sam asked for confirmation.

"Yeah man, you should see this blueberry pie!" Dean said enthusiastically to Harry. "Huge fucking blueberries, no top crust."

"You're going to have pie for breakfast?" Harry asked. Sam laughed softly, and Dean just grinned.

"Every meal of the day deserves a little dessert!"

Turns out, Dean was right about the pie. It was delicious. Sam actually seemed surprised when the waitress brought it out. When Harry asked why he seemed to shocked, he said that they hadn't actually been to the diner in over eight years.

"Eight years?" Harry said. "You remembered pie from eight years ago?"

"Dude, you do not forget pie like this," Dean muttered around a mouthful of said pie.

"It is good pie," Sam agreed.

"So, do you guys have a map of America in your brain, with all the best places to stop for pie mentally circled?" Harry laughed.

"Pretty much," Dean said with a wink.

Once they were finished with their pie, they hit the road again. Harry was in charge of directions, which he did by using a locating spell and having his wand simply point in the direction the rest of his team were, then telling Dean to drive in that vague direction. Dean seemed fine with this, as he and Sam seemed to also have a map of America in their head with all the roads with the least traffic highlighted.

Harry's team were traveling by broomstick. Normally, Harry would have loved to join them, but there was actually something kind of nice about sitting in the back of Dean's car, listening to music while the scenery flew by.

When they reached Virginia, Harry called Deacon on his mirror for an update. The Dementors were in Pennsylvania. Dean and Sam decided to find a motel just outside of Washington, D.C. for the night.

They found a small place that seemed to have an underwater theme to it, and Harry wasn't quite sure why since it was miles inland, but Sam and Dean simply shrugged.

They ordered food in for supper, and Dean placed their file on the small motel table and pulled up a chair. Flipping through the biographical information that he and Sam had reviewed the night before, and reaching another bundle of papers that they hadn't had a chance to look at yet. Sam sat beside Dean and read over his shoulder again.

Harry was just about to ask if they could pass the pages over to him when they were done with them, so he could read them more thoroughly himself, when his communicating mirror spoke his name.

"Yes, Phil?" Harry said, flipping it open.

"Delivery for Captain Potter," Phil deadpanned. "Permission to come aboard?"

"Granted," Harry said laughing, knowing that Phil had probably already had a look around the motel before calling.

There was a knock at the door, and then Phil walked into the room, carrying a stone bowl.

"Excellent," Harry said. "You've found one!"

"Yes, because I love spending my day's off rummaging through my grandmother's attic," Phil answered. "Just don't break it, Ma would kill me."

"How on earth would I break a pensieve, Phil?" Harry asked. Phil just rolled his eyes.

"I'm sure you'd find a way, sir," Phil answered. "Is there anything else that I can do for you while I'm not obligated to do anything for you?"

"No, Phil, that's all, thanks," Harry replied. "I'll see you tomorrow."

Phil took his leave, glancing over at the Winchesters only briefly with a small wave. Harry carried the pensieve over to the table and placed it carefully down. It was a little different than the one Harry had inherited from Dumbledore, but Harry was sure that it functioned just the same.

Dean and Sam both looked up from the papers as the stone bowl clunked onto the table in front of them.

"So..." Harry said, "Who wants to go first?"

"Uh, are we supposed to guess what it is?" Dean said. "Because if so, my answer is 'large stone bowl', what do I win?"

"It's a pensieve," Harry answered. "I told you I'd let you see my memories if you wanted. To make up for the fact that I looked at yours. The pensieve allows me to show you any memory I have. So, who wants to go first?"

Both brothers were now leaning over the bowl curiously.

"How does it work?" Sam asked.

"Choose who goes first, and I'll show you," Harry replied.

"I-" Sam started.

"I'll go first," Dean cut in abruptly. Sam didn't look too happy about this, but he didn't say anything.

"Ok, Dean," Harry said. "What do you want to see? I saw your happiest memories, would you like to see mine?"

Dean seemed to consider it for a moment.

"No," he answered. "Since you saw my memories without permission. I want to see a memory that you don't want to share. I want to see something that you normally wouldn't let anyone see."

Harry swallowed, he supposed he should have seen this coming.

"Dean..." Sam said, "I don't think-"

"No, it's ok," Harry replied. "Uh, what sort of...I mean, there are memories with my wife, but I hardly doubt you want to see that..."

"Ugh!" Dean said, waving his hands through the air as if to get rid of something. "Hot as your wife is, I do not need to see you getting it on."

Harry laughed, "well, that's a relief."

"Show me something from the war," Dean said. "Something you did that you wish you hadn't..."

It was then, that Harry realized that this wasn't about being fair anymore, it was about testing his character. As Harry settled on a memory and lifted his wand to his temple, he only hoped that he would pass.

Chapter 20

Masterpost

Comments

( 23 comments — Leave a comment )
lelaro
Jul. 9th, 2009 03:20 am (UTC)
who the heck is edlund? also yay for dean intimidating harry. i have developed a liking for this for some strange reason.
jillsjourney
Jul. 9th, 2009 04:08 am (UTC)
carver edlund! the prophet chuck!
hells_half_acre
Jul. 9th, 2009 05:14 am (UTC)
Correct!

It's technically a spoiler for 4x18, but not really, since this is going to be the only mention of him and they don't know who he is.
hells_half_acre
Jul. 9th, 2009 05:15 am (UTC)
I did think of you after I wrote it ;-)

Glad you enjoyed!
claudiapriscus
Jul. 9th, 2009 07:27 am (UTC)
another great chapter, though it is not my favorite of all of them. although it did my heart good to to see the reference to our favorite prophet.

And I think half of that was due to the image of big tough magical secret agents getting their information from some trashy and obscure paperbacks. And since they call him "edlund" and not "chuck", i'm going to embellish this mental image by imagining that they don't know about the prophet thing, and instead one of the secret agents was a secret die-hard fan (perhaps a member of that website) who then had to admit to reading them with enough slavish attention to detail to have realized they're real.

Anyway, rambling over, I'm dying for more!
hells_half_acre
Jul. 9th, 2009 03:37 pm (UTC)
Ha! I like your mental image...it's probably spot on! I can just see some Muggle-born Auror trying to speak up at a meeting, saying "Uh...this sounds familiar..."

Thanks for reading! I know this chapter isn't as awesome as some of my other ones. I needed a transition between plot points and this is what happened! The next one will be much more interesting, and I will try to get it up as soon as possible!
claudiapriscus
Jul. 9th, 2009 05:38 pm (UTC)
it wasn't a complaint! you can't have epic scenes of epic something or other every chapter. I get that. :)
hells_half_acre
Jul. 9th, 2009 06:24 pm (UTC)
Haha, ok...I guess it's just me that is slightly annoyed by the unepicness of this chapter ;-)
auriliawestlake
Jul. 9th, 2009 09:16 am (UTC)
As for the later stuff, they cite some source called 'Edlund', but I have no idea what that means.

I snorfled so hard at this! (I was really glad I wasn't drinking something at the time - it woulda made me hafta buy a new laptop!)

"How on earth would I break a pensieve, Phil?" Harry asked. Phil just rolled his eyes.

"I'm sure you'd find a way, sir." Phil answered.


Giggles. Probably worth a chuckle every time I think of it, too. (Rather like caffienekitty's The Toaster Incident, part of which I have quoted on my fanfiction.net profile page.)

It was then, that Harry realized that this wasn't about being fair anymore, it was about testing his character. As Harry settled on a memory and lifted his wand to his temple, he only hoped that he would pass.

A very evil place to leave us hanging, but a sensible break to the chapter (from a writer's perspective, of course). It has my imagination running overtime, trying to recall all the details from the last few chapters of Order of the Phoenix all the way through the end of Deathly Hallows. Right now, I'm guessing that Harry's going to show Dean the time he tried to use Crucio on Bellatrix. Maybe. Or maybe how he chased after Snape following the events of Dumbledore's death (especially since Snape wasn't really a bad guy, just a bastard).

So, with all that said: Write! Write! Write! Feed your muse some s'mores so she can get back to whispering the tale in your ear.
hells_half_acre
Jul. 9th, 2009 03:43 pm (UTC)
I'm glad I got some laughs out of you! I sit around smirking to myself while I write, it's great fun (especially in comparison to the heavy one-shots I wrote before I started this thing).

I still haven't read The Toaster Incident. I should totally track that down later when I have some reading time.

Don't forget, while wracking your brain, that this is set in the future. Harry has had time to heal from some things, and regrets can be mercurial. Also, he needs something that is easy to show in a pensieve...the last few chapters of Order of the Phoenix would take me a long time to write out :P

Mmm...I love s'mores!
achilles_eel
Jul. 9th, 2009 09:54 am (UTC)
Oh Dean... MEN and their macho-macho-let's-test-the-strength-of-your-cajones-.... :P

"Is there anything else that I can do for you while I'm not obligated to do anything for you?"

-rotfl- Awesome. I love Phil SO MUCH, and if you kill him off I will be very angry. Very, very angry. :D

Ha, Sam and his long legs... They never seemed to have a problem with short beds, though. I guess Sam just never mentioned it. At least Harry's magic comes in handy. :D

Love it!!! Can't wait for the next installment!!!
achilles_eel
Jul. 9th, 2009 09:57 am (UTC)
Whiiiiiiich reminds me..... I LOVED THE CHUCK REFERENCE!!!! :D Sorry, I just HAD to throw that in. Very clever of you; made me smile. :)
hells_half_acre
Jul. 9th, 2009 03:50 pm (UTC)
Yay! That line by Phil is one of my absolutely favorites this chapter! I'm so glad that you caught it! And don't worry...I'm not much of a killing type... ;-)

Sam and his long legs are more just me fixing something that the show never mentions. They never seem to have a problem on the show, but really, there is no way that Sam would be able to fit on a standard motel bed!

Chuck is pretty awesome. I couldn't help but throw in a brief reference to him!

Thanks for reading!
redrikki
Jul. 9th, 2009 01:35 pm (UTC)
::Giggles:: A Chuck shout-out and a mental map of America highlighting the best pie. I am seriously loving this story. I also like the way you mix the light hearted stuff with some more serious issues like demons after them and the test of Harry's morals/character.
hells_half_acre
Jul. 9th, 2009 03:52 pm (UTC)
Thanks! Unsurprisingly, I wrote this chapter after getting some awesome blueberry pie at a diner out in the middle of nowhere...
(Deleted comment)
hells_half_acre
Jul. 9th, 2009 03:53 pm (UTC)
I'm glad you think so! ;-)
jujuberry136
Jul. 9th, 2009 09:55 pm (UTC)
The unspeakables know Chuck the prophet? I wonder if they're the LARPers the guy from the comic book store was wondering about :D

Can't wait to see which memory Harry chooses and how Dean reacts. I think he might be surprised at Wizarding warfare
hells_half_acre
Jul. 9th, 2009 11:17 pm (UTC)
Haha, man, I think my commenters should get together and write a spin-off about LARPing Unspeakables! That's hilarious.

Thanks for reading :)
keerawa
Oct. 11th, 2009 08:42 pm (UTC)
"So, do you guys have like a map of America in your brain, with all the best places to stop for pie mentally circled?"
*laughs* The Winchester map of America, pie edition.

Fascinated by the memory Dean asked for.

hells_half_acre
Oct. 11th, 2009 08:53 pm (UTC)
Hehehe...Dean does love his pie...

Thanks for reading!
trystan830
May. 19th, 2010 04:03 pm (UTC)
"Edlund" - hee!

"So, do you guys have a map of America in your brain, with all the best places to stop for pie mentally circled?" Harry laughed.
"Pretty much," Dean said with a wink.

that is SO Dean!

onwards! =)

Edited at 2010-05-19 04:04 pm (UTC)
hells_half_acre
May. 19th, 2010 05:08 pm (UTC)
;-)
trystan830
May. 19th, 2010 05:30 pm (UTC)
=D
( 23 comments — Leave a comment )

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