Hell's Half Acre (hells_half_acre) wrote,
Hell's Half Acre

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Quick Reaction: 9x13 The Purge

Aptly named episode tonight for so many reasons...

No wine tonight, but that doesn't mean my memory is going to be any better - so yeah, keep in mind this is only after watching the episode once, about an hour ago and then walking home in the cold cold night. So, quotes will not be exact and I might get some events out of order...

So, we begin at a hot dog eating contest. I find food contests to be pretty disgusting... I also find people getting the fat sucked out of them to be pretty disgusting. Basically, everything about the MOTW this week was disgusting. I will say though that sfx and vfx did a fantastic job! I was so disgusted.

Anywho, hot-dog dude cheats! Did anyone catch the black dude's reaction in the crowd shot to the "that's not a hotdog in my pocket" line? It was the best. New favourite extra.

Then dude gets killed...and it's gross.

Cut to Sam and Dean! Dean is looking horrible and hasn't slept. He stayed up all night watching Rudy and then Unforgiven(?). Rudy, I wholeheartedly approve of - I love that movie. Really though, he obviously stayed up all night feeling sad. :( And then Sam asks if he's feeling sad because of what Sam said, and Dean's like "no", and Sam is like, "good, because I was just being honest." SAM THAT IS NOT A COMFORT! Why don't you rub a little salt into that wound, dude. You're supposed to SOFTEN hard honesty blows, not press on the bruise!

But he's found the weird hot-dog death, so it's off to take a whore's bath for Dean....hehe, I love Sam's face at that name. But it's a term I grew up hearing a lot, so I kind of love that Dean used it.... and then it's off to Stillwater Minnesota, where they meet the most adorable Sheriff ever!!

Seriously, she's ADORABLE. I love the fact that they actually gave her an accent for the region. Same with whatshisface - the skinny hotdog-dude.

Blah blah blah, investigating. Skinny dude's wife is Roma... so Sam suspects that she put a curse on fat hotdog dude... and steals the evidence. Which she then comes to retrieve, and they find out that she was cheating on her husband and didn't kill fat hotdog dude at all.

Then another murder - this time a woman trying to get skinny for her wedding day. SIDEBAR PSA: Listen, guys, you shouldn't try to get skinny for your wedding day - it's not about what you look like, it's about who you are marrying. Also, it really annoys me that when she gets on the scale she complains about how she's GAINED weight. If you work out, you will gain muscle. Especially if she's lifting weights, which she was at least doing a little of... you can lose inches and gain weight REALLY easily. I've done it before myself, where I put on five pounds and went down a size in all my clothes. Never judge your "health": on the number on the scale. Judge it by how you feel. You can be large and healthy, and you can be slim and weigh a lot.

Anyway, Sam and Dean investigate and find a weird suction mark. Then Dean takes over the "talk to the pretty girl" part of the job, because Sam is awkward with women... Dean is "just being honest." NICE! Hahaha...

Then the plot thickens, because she has a suction mark too, but she's not dead!!

Dean does research and discovers that the trainer girl had been to the Canyon Valley Spa....where people are losing weight miraculously! So, it's off to go undercover as fitness trainers.

Dean overcompensates in the interview and comes off as way too harsh, so it's Sam that actually gets the fitness trainer job... but since it's a spa and not a fitness camp, he just teaches yoga.

And then after 9 years, we finally get Sam in shorts and a tanktop. Hahaha... NICE!

Meanwhile, Dean is put on kitchen duty... and it's all "rabbit food" that he doesn't like, so he can't even enjoy snacking! The blows just keep coming for our poor Dean.

I loved the conversation between him and Sam, where uh...what was his name? Raoul? Anyway, Raoul accuses him of flirting. And I love that when Dean asks Sam what he even knows about yoga, Sam says "you aren't the only one who's spent a weekend with someone bendy." Hahaha... the funny thing is that I'm willing to bet that Dean didn't learn any yoga on his weekend with Lisa, whereas Sam obviously did with whatever girl he was with - which means that Sam actually spent at least part of the weekend ACTUALLY DOING YOGA! So, yeah, still not cool in Dean's eyes, there Sam.

Obviously though, Sam doesn't know that much about yoga, since he's very awkward about it and doesn't know that most people don't hold poses for longer than a minute max. While he checks their poses - he realizes that they ALL have suction marks.

Oh, while all this is happening, our adorable Sheriff friend is at the spa! She's getting her spa treatment, which is "cupping" - which, is an actual chinese-thing, I think... that I don't believe in at all, so I won't say anything else. I will say though that I don't think it sucks THAT much skin up into the cup, that was gross. I could be wrong though, because it's not like I've ever done it (or ever will do it.) The sheriff falls asleep suspiciously fast and then the spa lady SUCKS FAT OUT OF HER WITH HER WEIRD TONGUE! It is super super gross.

Meanwhile, Dean is hungry...and Raoul (I am calling him Raoul) puts him in charge of the pudding....well, the pudding is the only thing on the menu that Dean likes, so yeah... he eats it. Listen, Dean, I'm not calling into question your professionalism here, but do you really think it's wise to eat ANYTHING at a place that might be killing people?!?! I wouldn't.

And sure enough, it's NOT wise. Dean finds himself very drugged. So, he calls Sam. Sam, who's cover is accidentally blown by the Sheriff. Oops. Drugged Dean is pretty hilarious. Sam eventually finds him in the basement next to the sweet potatoes - and then Sam goes on a rampage in the kitchen to find out what's in the pudding. The chef claims their "supplements", but when Sam shows them to Dean, Dean confirms that they are actually roofies. I love Dean's reasoning for knowing what roofies look like - "I don't want to end up in a bathtub with my kidneys missing...in Chechnya". Hahaha... on the one hand, it's hilarious because it's a ridiculously paranoid reason, on the other hand, it's potentially heartbreaking, because it's probably just the story he gives because the real reason is that Dean's a very very pretty man who hangs out in a lot of very very sketchy places...and has done since he was a teenager.

Anyway, Sam gets him an energy drink and makes sure he's going to be okay... and then it's off to talk to the Sheriff.

Meanwhile, spa husband of spa lady has raided the Impala's glove compartment! Oh no! He's found the fake badges and knows that they're hunters...and we as an audience discover that it's not spa lady doing the murdering in town, it's someone else...

Sam and Dean talk to the Sheriff, who has only been at the spa one day, but has already lost 10 pounds! Aside PSA: If you lose 10 pounds in a single day, go to the doctor immediately. It is time to freak the fuck out, because you are dying. According to my friend, who knows more about human health then I do, it's healthy to lose 2 pounds per week...but if you lose more than that through diet restriction, you are doing is slowing down your metabolism, so it'll be even easier to gain all that weight back and possibly more.

Spa lady is trying to dump the evidence....which is apparently containers of human fat... SO GROSS...before Sam and Dean find them. Aside PSA: If you are trying to destroy evidence, do not put it in the trash. FLUSH IT! My god. Changing it's location in your house is not going to change the fact that it is still in your house.

Spa lady confesses to Dean that she's a fish taco... hahahaha...that's what I heard too. I think it's pishtaco? Anyway, it's a Peruvian fat-sucker. SUPER GROSS! But it's not her doing the killing, it's...dun dun dun... HER BROTHER!

I'm glad it's her brother, because for a moment there I was really worried that her and spa husband had somehow had a kid (I don't even know how that would work genetically) and this would be an episode about killing children or something... but it makes WAY more sense for it to be an episode about siblings betraying each other.

While all this is going on, spa husband is getting murdered by Raoul. Sucks to be spa husband, but seriously, I'm not sure how he thought that was going to go. I mean, you find out your brother in law is capable of murder, you probably don't want to threaten to kick him out with force...you probably want to do what spa lady did and tell the hunters how to kill him. Maybe they could have even made up some story - like Raoul was holding them hostage and coming into the cupping-sessions or something.

Also, am I the only one who couldn't stop giggling whenever they said "cupping" because...um...cupping. I'm twelve, apparently.

Anyway, Sam finds murdered spa husband, and tells spa lady... who they have tied up for safe keeping. And spa lady tells them how to kill Raoul to prove that she is on their side.

So, it's off to kill Raoul. Raoul has killed the chef too, because hey, why not. Then he beats the shit out of Sam, and Sam gets strangled, because it's Tuesday...and then Dean flies in for the rescue and chops Roaul's tongue out, which kills him, apparently.

Then it's the aftermath... Sam and Dean feed a story about a crazy psycho-killer to the Sheriff.... and spa lady has had her entire family murdered in one day.

And then Dean wants to kill her - and this is the part of the episode that both me and my friend had a problem with, because SERIOUSLY!? Can we not get a little consistency on this issue? Is Dean the type of person who sees things in black and white - monster=bad, human=good...or is he the type of guy who can leave monsters who aren't hurting anyone in peace?!! I understand them going back and forth on this issue between seasons, but IT'S BEEN ONE EPISODE! Dean let Garth and his family live JUST LAST WEEK. What's so special about spa lady that she suddenly has to die?! She feeds, humans lose weight... it's win win! It's practically the perfect symbiotic relationship! And fine, he's trying to be "professional" like Sam asked - slightly misinterpreting what Sam meant - and thinking that "professional" hunters always kill the monster. But, then when Sam disabuses him of that notion, Dean then SEND HER BACK TO PERU?!!? Seriously?! She's got to leave the whole country and give up this awesome spa that she founded?!! How is THAT fair?! I would have been fine with it if she was like "My whole family is dead. I think I'll go back to Peru. I don't want to be here anymore." But to MAKE her go?! Ugh... just, be consistent. Either Dean has changed after purgatory and lets monsters live now if they're good people, or for some reason he's on a murdering kick, but don't vacillate!

Anyway...rant over... sorry... I know I don't usually complain that much, but that really annoyed me.

Now we get to the actual Purge in this episode, because the guys go back to the bunker and have a talk in the kitchen. And I thought it was really interesting that they're talks were all in the kitchen in this episode. I think the library must be a symbol of their unity or something...like, maybe with them fighting, they're just going back and forth between their separate rooms and the kitchen and that's it... no more hanging out together in the library.

But, right, the actual purge of the episode...and the one that is needed... it's super super harsh, but the Winchesters actually start TALKING about their problems, and I think that despite the way this conversations feels devastating, all that stuff NEEDED to be said. They needed to get all their feelings out and in the open so that they can hopefully start again from a healthier place.

Dean tells Sam that he saved him, that he saved him from the pishtaco, and he saved him in the church, and he saved him with Gadreel, and he'd do it all again. Sam tells him that's the problem... The fact that there isn't anything that Dean wouldn't put in front of Sam is actually Sam's issue....because now that Sam's had a chance to think about it, had a chance to actually SEE the consequences, he realizes that Dean shouldn't be doing that.

And I'm preemptively cringing at the amount of Sam-hate I'm bound to see everywhere, and I'm also cringing at the comments I might get - but I actually agree with Sam here. I see exactly what he's saying... it was a selfish decision for him to decide to live in that church instead of ridding the world of demons forever. Not only that, but Sam has years of stacked up evidence that him living is a bad thing... Dean saving him in S2 started them on the road to the apocalypse. Cas trying to save him in S6 not only let Soulless!Sam onto the world, but also destroyed Dean's chance at a normal life with Lisa and Ben.... Dean telling Sam he loved him and making him want to live again at the end of S8, meant that hell didn't get closed... Dean saving him with Gadreel in the hospital meant that Kevin died, Dean saving him FROM Gadreel meant that Crowley is now free instead of locked up. Dean not letting Sam die is NOT a good thing.

(And it also brings us back to S8, since this would have been a MUCH better reason for Sam not look for Dean when he disappeared and seemed to be dead....though, I still think Sam would have looked for Kevin at the very least... so I still have issues with that arc in S8.)

Which brings us back to S5, with Bobby asking Dean "Are you afraid of losing? Or are you afraid of losing your brother?" And Sam basiclaly repeats the same thing here - is Dean saving Sam to do something nice for Sam? Or is he saving Sam because Dean is desperate not to be alone.

But right, let's get back to the scene... because Dean tells Sam that Sam would have done the same if it were Dean - and Sam admits that no, he wouldn't. And this is devastating for poor Dean, who has lived his WHOLE LIFE based on the idea that self-sacrifice is how you show your love. Seriously, think about Dean's life....all he ever does is make sacrifices for his family, because he loves them. It's not exactly healthy, but it's all he knows. And it's true he didn't sell his soul this time around, but is was still a self-sacrifice...it was the self-sacrifice of Dean's morals, really.

Sam telling him that he WOULDN'T do everything under the sun to get Dean back is a kick in the nuts... but again, I have to say it makes perfect sense, because back in S4, Sam DID do everything under the sun to get Dean back...and it ended with him drinking demon blood... and the whole kill-Lilith mission was about revenge for killing Dean... it didn't matter that Dean was alive again, Sam was still in "avenge my brother's death" mode. And I mean, who wouldn't be after watching the person you love most in the world get torn apart in front of you and then finding out they had also been tortured in hell for 40 years. The lesson Sam brought away from that was that there needed to be limits on what they would do for each other.

But, yeah, Dean's been kicked in the teeth, because he thinks Sam doesn't love him like he loves Sam...which goes right back to his S1 insecurities.

And it's hard, because I also feel for Dean... I mean, what's his measure? They both agreed that killing the YED wasn't more important than each other's lives... they also both agreed that defeating Lucifer and stopping the apocalypse WAS more important than Sam's life. Sam was the only one who could do that though, so it makes sense. Sam ISN'T the only one that can close hell.... some other hunter could take that bullet for the team any day. But then, saving Sam using an untrustworthy angel... how does that factor in? Dean thought "Ezekiel" was trustworthy at the time, because Cas said he was good... is the fact that Dean was tricked important? Is honouring Sam's decisions more important than Sam's life? Technically, Dean WAS honouring Sam's decision because Sam wanted to live when they were in the church, it was only when he was in the coma and thought he was dying that he accepted death... so, did Dean really violate a do-not-resuscitate order? Or was he perfectly within his right to try an experimental treatment on his terminal brother based on their previous conversions? Is Sam right to blame Dean for his own survivor's guilt?

(The other small problem we had with this scene is when Sam says "what if a hunter had found me as Gadreel and killed me, did I deserve to die then" or whatever he said... our issue was that hunters don't kill angels. Angels kill angels and there aren't seriously enough of those angel blades to go around. If there are, then I am mad.)

Anyway, now that Sam and Dean have had their huge completely honest purge of their feelings and their brotherhood has been successfully demolished...how do they build from here? What's the first step on the path to recovery?

As usual, let me know your thoughts and feelings in the comments below!
Tags: quick reaction, season 9

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